How I Knew

I knew the adjustment to my adopted culture was complete when I came to the realization that my towel doesn’t feel properly clean unless it is crunchy and wrinkled from drying outside on the line.

My indoctrination first gained momentum when I mastered the art of eating Marmite. As a salt fanatic, I knew this stuff would prove useful but it didn’t happen overnight. There are many Mr. Miyagi-like steps required to achieve perfection and all are mandatory.

  1. The toast must be cooked to the perfect state of ‘medium’. Not too soft and not to crispy.
  2. The toast must cool before application.
  3. Butter must be applied as a base layer.
  4. A very thin amount of Marmite must be evenly applied to the entire surface. There will almost always be Marmite left on the knife which must be disposed of, not spread onto the toast just because it is there.

As a peanut butter lover, I assumed more was better. Not so for Marmite.

Sussed! I could pass a New Zealand citizenship test right now.

Kiwi Glossary: Suss. To assess or figure out. After several months of confusion, the newcomer finally sussed the seemingly simple task of making toast. 


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